Time for Two

In the beginning, there was a man and a woman. They dated, fell in love, got married and had kids. Then, sadly, they stopped dating.

So much vies for our attention – jobs, housework, children – that we often fall into bed at night too exhausted to do much more than say “good-night” to our mates.

But, there’s still hope for romance. All you have to do is take the initiative to date your mate. And we have a few ideas for you:

Decide: First, set aside time once a week (at the very least, once a month) to date your beloved. Figure out what times work best. It can be as simple as grabbing a bite to eat, strolling hand-in-hand on the beach or going grocery shopping. Dating can also be as elaborate as planning a weekend getaway. Spontaneity is great, and so is meticulous planning!

Wives, by deciding to date your husband, you let him know that he is important to you, that he is appreciated and that you desire to spend time with him. Just the decision to date, then, lays a foundation for caring, romance and intimacy.

Act: Plan your date; make it a priority. Last-minute things come up and that’s O.K., but only on occasion. Set aside a few hours for your night, morning or afternoon together. Make arrangements for the kids to be watched by relatives, friends or a sitter. If you don’t have family nearby, form a co-op with friends to exchange sitting services.

Make a reservation for the restaurant that you both enjoy. Go somewhere fun: a hike, Disneyland, breakfast in the park, an action movie, out for dessert, etc.

Think: What would please your spouse? Where would he like to go or like do? Connect with each other. Touch each other. Walk side-by-side, holding hands. Hug. Talk. Say,  “I love spending time with you,” and mean it.  Do NOT allow your conversation to center only around the kids.

Enjoy: Have fun with each other! This is your time together – make the most of it.

Realize that dating your mate isn’t another thing to add to your list, but a positive, new direction that is delightfully rewarding for both you and your husband. fam

Susan Peterson is a contributing writer to Inland Empire Family Magazine.

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