EVERYTHING
FOR YOUR FAMILY
KID
QUIPS
“One night, my 3-year-old asked me if she could sleep in my bed. I told her no. She said, “That’s not fair! Why does Daddy get to sleep in your bed?” READ MORE
Single Parenthood
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Single Parenthood By Lynn Armitage Frog County That prince-of-a-guy is out there, somewhere On any given Friday or Saturday night, Orange County is hopping with hopeful singles – young, old and middle-aged – jumping from eateries to bars to nightclubs looking for romance and a chance encounter with “The One.” If you listen very closely, straining to hear past the pulsating music, clinking glasses and small talk, you’ll detect a familiar sound in the background that only grows louder as the night gets older and your judgment fuzzier . . . Ribbit. Ribbit. It’s been awhile since I’ve addressed single-parent dating, and for good reason – because I’ve been busy doing it. While I have met some wonderful men over the years, I’ve also bumped into my share of frogs in this town – men who have no interest in dating women with children. Frog County, I sometimes call it. And I’m not alone in my disillusionment, either. I’ve shared many meals with attractive and intelligent single mothers – great catches by anyone’s standards – with whom the conversation usually revolves around our favorite topic – how hard it is to find a good, available man. To be fair, I know some men have an equally hard time meeting a good woman. I just don’t understand why we can’t seem to find each other. My friends and I have tried Internet dating. Match-and-Miss.com and e-Smarmony. One friend hit the jackpot and got married to a great guy she met on one of these sites. They just had a baby. I even joined a dating service once, the “pay to play” concept. They fixed me up with a very successful, handsome man, my “perfect match,” so they claimed. During appetizers, he discovered I had children and blurted out, “I told them not to fix me up with anyone who had kids!” I then spent the rest of our lunch watching Prince Not-So-Charming catch flies with his sticky tongue. So where do single parents find true love? The answer isn’t in this Valentine’s column, sorry. But I do have a suggestion: Write down precisely what you’re looking for in the man or woman of your dreams – “The Sequel,” that is. It may help you narrow down the field a bit. And you’ll probably discover, as I did, that the ideal qualities you’re seeking in a mate change from year to year, even decade to decade. Here’s the list I started once upon a time: The 20s: Cinderella Years • Intelligent • Sense of humor • Clear direction in life • A sex god • Affectionate • Attentive • Creative • Well-mannered • Gregarious • Tall • Athletic • Handsome • A good family, preferably of royal lineage • Generous • Kind to animals • Friendly with strangers • Owns a horse-drawn carriage The 30s: White-Picket-Fence Years • Educated • Ambitious • CEO potential • Sense of humor • Works hard • Trustworthy if working late • Stays out of my way • Family man • Enjoys sex, preferably with me • An occasional sportsman • A skilled handyman • Doesn’t abuse animals • Likes touring model homes on weekends The 40s: Disillusioned Years • Shows up on time • Tolerates children who aren’t his • Doesn’t fall asleep during sex • Reliable set of tools • Frog warts OK Lynn Armitage, a syndicated columnist and senior writer for Churm Media, still believes in fairy tales. She welcomes your comments at: larmitage@churmmedia.com. |
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