EVERYTHING
FOR YOUR FAMILY
KID
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“One night, my 3-year-old asked me if she could sleep in my bed. I told her no. She said, “That’s not fair! Why does Daddy get to sleep in your bed?” READ MORE
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Having a family that suffers from selective hearing can be terribly maddening. Feeling as though you’re being seen and not heard, or having to repeat yourself multiple times is frustrating. A family’s level of communication has even caused some adults to question their parenting abilities and feel defeated. Although most parents would gladly improve the overall communication in their household, few have the time to actively change how their family communicates. In a world where it seems that you’re losing touch with your family, or if you question how to implement good communication practices, you’re not alone in the search for simple and easy direction. You don’t have to purchase a bullhorn or perform a Broadway act to grab your family’s attention. Capturing everyone’s attention, and having confidence that you’re all being heard may not be as tough as you think. If you’re hoping to improve the level of effective communication in your family, you’ll find these easily implemented tips invaluable. [1] Demonstrate that you communicate Children willingly show off their prized possessions to peers and pals during show and tell. Standing up and declaring they are ready to “show” the class their pet turtle, or “tell” everyone about a special treasure, children appreciate the respect paid to their demonstration of communication. Demonstrating your willingness and readiness to communicate can be as easy as looking your child directly in the eyes or showing him that you hear what is being said. Demonstrate that you are paying attention by nodding or through your facial expressions as your child is relating a story or sharing his feelings. [2] Communicate on your child’s level Imagine trying to talk to someone who is three feet taller than you are. How would you react to a towering individual asking you why you made a mistake or acted in a particular manner? This seemingly dramatic interpretation is actually how many young children view conversations with adults. When you’re trying to have a meaningful conversation with your 5-year-old, leveling the field of communication affords great rewards. Kneeling down or sitting together brings you both to the same eye level. Without having to stare blankly upward or at your legs, your child is more likely to absorb what you’re saying and contribute to the conversation. Communicating with teens and tweens can be achieved by beginning a conversation with something that interests them. Discussing the current trend in fashion or a favorite sports team opens the door to deeper communication with older children. Communicating on your child’s level also includes choosing a location best suited to promote effective communication. Address the lack of organization in your child’s room by talking in his room instead of in the car on the way to school. Identify the time of day when your child seems more receptive to communicating. Younger children are usually most willing to communicate after eating or an hour after waking from a nap. Elementary-aged children generally prefer to unwind after school or activities before jumping into a conversation, while teens tend to communicate at various intervals that best suit their schedule and needs. [3]Ask for input You may find yourself gradually moving from balancing a household, organizing schedules and maintaining your sanity to becoming a one-person dynamic machine. The need to maintain ease and simplicity often leads to parents making decisions without asking for input or subconsciously avoiding communication. Even though time constraints prevent you from having a conversation with your family, you still have options. Take a poll to determine what to make for dinner next week. Leave busy teens a note on the refrigerator during the day to let them know you’re available to talk and are making an effort. Letting everyone know you’re open to hearing their opinions and concerns creates a positive atmosphere in which to communicate. [4] Act on what is being said It can be both disheartening and detrimental to feel a promise is broken or someone you trust has gone back on his or her word. You will improve communication within your family by following through on what is discussed. If you say you’ll go to the park after dinner, stick to your word. Even though adhering to a prior agreement to allow a friend over to play after school may suddenly become inconvenient, teach your child he can confidently and consistently rely on what you communicate. [5]Critiquing communication Despite having the best of intentions when correcting your child’s knack for misusing a word or speaking in slang, analyzing his communication may be counter-productive. Your child may lose sight of the grammatical lessons you’re working to instill or feel as though you’re not receiving the full meaning of his message. Determining which conversation warrants correcting his use of slang and which one requires your complete attention will ensure that you’re hearing what your child is communicating. You’ll also significantly increase the possibility your child will be receptive to hearing what you’re saying to him.m -Gina Roberts-Grey is a mom and contributor to numerous parenting publications. |
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